#1 - Acting?

Jan. 22, 2008

Hello, everyone, it’s me, your faithful friend, Jake.

What have you been doing, Jake, you may ask, since Fat City Mojo and The Summer of Jesus? Well, I reply, I’ve been being an actor in Chicago. Oh, really, and what have you been acting at? Most recently, I’ve been acting at being a model. Most recently, I’ve been acting at being a model, some would say that that's hardly acting, to which I would reply, You try fooling all those people into thinking you can model. Most recently, I’ve been acting at being a model, some would say that that's hardly acting, to which I would reply, You try fooling all those people into thinking you can model. Check out page 13 of the January 24, 2007, issue of Rolling Stone, you’ll find a frumpy guy, grumpy at having to do some extra sit-ups. Ought to give you a chuckle.

My posting has been long overdue, but now that I’m thirteen pages from sharing the cover of Rolling Stone with my , um, friend and colleague, Johnny Depp, ahem, I can write with confidence about my exploits in the commercial world. First off, I got paid pretty well, making about two month’s rent for half a day’s work. When I start booking one of those a week, look out, I can pay you all back the money you’ve loaned me over the years!

We shot that piece at a small gym in Chicago’s West Loop area, near Ukrainian Village I believe. The gym, whose name eludes me, is tucked into the middle of a crowded triangle block in an old red brick building. All the other brick buildings on the neighborhood’s other triangle blocks seem to lean in on each other for support and the narrow streets are worn and weary and cracked. The area has lots of character and little in the way of available legal parking.

Saverio Truglia was the photographer, a very cool guy with an even cooler name. He’s very meticulous, spending, no joke, about two hours setting up the simple shot. More light here, shutter that light, no, not that much, more than that, OK, perfect. Mmmm, no, move everything to the left six inches, um, make that a foot. Hollywood this over the patch on the hardwood and we’ve got to shoot now because the sun’ll be gone from that window in twenty minutes. He’s fun to watch work.

Note: I found out once we were shooting that I was supposed to be wearing the gigantic sweats because they wanted a beefy guy who looks like he used to box heavyweight before discovering Twinkies and the other joys of a sedentary lifestyle. And I thought I got cast because of my hotness. Right there in front of all the cute make-up and wardrobe girls making this happen, I had a junior high flush-faced flashback involving “husky” jeans. Hmm, yes, I wore husky jeans.

Humility strikes when you least expect it.

Anyway, I figure I’ve got a few good tales to tell if you’d like to hear them. I’ve been in a bunch of short films, a web series pilot, a few other print ads and a commercial for the Iowa Lottery. I’ll attach that one for you all to see. Seventeen Seconds of Glory (not what you think, geez). Hey, I think I just found my next story. Tune in next time when you’ll all say, Ooh, Jake, you’re the best and we love you! Ha, ha.

Hope this finds all of you enjoying your new year.

Best,

Jake

PS – I’ve given up a lot of my more acerbic opinions in the interest of a healthy colon. However, for those who tune in for my political